Why Marriage last (Not because of ‘couples Love’)Ogba Victor
We are leaving in a world where people marry and are married. In our world theirs something we call LOVE.
Lets define love then
A strong feeling of affection and concern toward another person, as that arising from kinship or close friendship. 2. A strong feeling of affection and concern for another person accompanied by sexual attraction, respect, and intimacy.
By love here, we’re discussing the natural love between a man and a his wife.
But what do we see in our world?
We see that after couples claim to love each other, get intimate and even openly declare to love each other, visit places, eat together etc when they finally get married, they can’t keep their homes.
With the above statement, I want to state that In Christianity there is a limit to courtship both in time and intimacy.
We see that after all the heavy dance, gifts, Joy and happiness on the wedding day, few months or few years after, couples fight each other, quarrel, cheat, lie, and some even kill their spouse.
We see that divorce is now a trend in the society of which God clearly says;
Malachi 2:16 For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel,
The question then becomes “Where did all the Love go? How could they have forgotten the good times? “
The Answer is simple- That strong feeling of affection and concern toward another person, as that arising from kinship or close friendship(love) between a man and a woman is not enough to keep a marriage.
Then what exactly are also needed to keep a union strong until death parts it?
1. A Greater Love for God.
The love for God is the beginning of loving your spouse. If you love your partener more than that for God, then that marriage is liable to fail.
Math. 12 vs 27 Anyone who loves his father or mothermore than Me is not worthy of Me; anyone who loveshis son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me;
John 14: 23 Jesus replied, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word….
From the scriptures above, it could be ascertained that anyone who truly loves God will keep His word.
Anyone who loves God will obey his principles and treat his or her spouse the way God will want.
Your greater love for God will make you not to cheat on your wife, your greater love for God will make you forgive unconditionally and you wont raise your fist against your spouse.
If God comes first you will condemn yourself whenever you are wrong because you care for you relationship with God.
This is exactly vice versa, If you love you spouse more than God, you wont care about how God feels about how you treat your spouse.
2. The fear for God.
Proverbs 9:10 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.
It is nothing new that the fear of God has been lost in our world. Show me a couple who fear God and i’ll show you a couple who will last till death do them, part.
Luke 12: 5 But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear the One who,after you have been killed, has power to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear Him!
Can it be that a man or a woman who acknowledges that God takes account of our deeds and that we are liable to be judged jeopardise the peace in the home. Answer is NO.
It is only the fear of God that will prevent a man or his wife from cheating when no one is watching. It is only the fear of God that reminds a partner that the marriage vow is a promise before God that is not meant to be broken. Oh! yes it is only the fear of God
If the fear of God is in any marriage, the marriage is bound not to end until death.
3. No regard for God’s will in choosing a spouse.
Do you want you marriage to last? Do you want to enjoy peace in your marriage? Don’t marry out of human affection. Ask God for his will.
Matthew 5: 3 (New Living Translation) “God blesses those who are poor(in spirit) and realize their need for him..”
A man once narrated of how he almost married the wrong woman, not because she wasn’t a Christian but it was not the will of God. According to him it was after he was turned down that he went to God and God showed him who his wife should be.
The wife also narrated of how she was almost going to get married to a White man but God said “No” to her and in a vision showed her her husband to be.
Oh! yes. Christians should look beyond affection and the love of a man and woman and ask God for a direction. If anything is certain, it is that God’s will is always the Best.
Psalm 25:12 “Who is the man who fears the LORD? He will instruct him in the way he should choose.”
Love between a man and his is wife is not what is able to keep them together in a union. As we have seen this clearly among us even among believers.
Not withstanding, without love no marriage union can work a. For the love we have for our God must come into our marriage and must grow beyond the one we have for our partner.
As Children of God we must be careful not to let our love for our spouse become greater than our love for our God. For we can truly love & respect each other when we love God more.